How can I miss you if you won't go away?

As we see old rockers dying off around us every week like thirsty dinosaurs on the veldt, we are once again being treated to that most precious and unreliable event, the Farewell Tour.

Elton John just finished his last farewell tour supposedly but it would be fair to say he milked it for all it was worth, considering it started in 2018. That is one long goodbye. Sorry man, we let the sun go down on you.

The Eagles just announced their latest farewell tour, with Steely Dan opening. 

I am not sure how many farewells that makes but I know they were never going to play after 1994 and then they had their first farewell tour in 2005. But obviously, it is not like anybody is paying attention.

The Who are still playing. No matter that their first farewell tour was in 1982. Ditto Kiss, Judas Priest, Motley Crue and Black Sabbath, who had their farewell tour in 2000 and then topped it off with the The End tour in 2017. Crafty. 

Lynyrd Skynyrd had their farewell tour in 2018, back to work this year. The list is endless. Cher came back ten years after her final tour, saying "what else am I supposed to do?"

I mention this because the Grateful Dead cover band that is called Dead and Co. is going to supposedly play their last three concerts in San Francisco pretty soon. And tickets are going to cost a whopper, over five hundred clams for floor seats on the last night.

Now this particular band has as much relationship to the Grateful Dead as I do to Steinbeck, they have an original member rhythm guitarist/vocalist whose voice is shot and a drummer/percussionist that never could keep time and everybody else is a fill in.

There's not enough acid in this world that could get me to go, even if they were paying me. Rather undergo major dental surgery. And I have news for you, I saw the Grateful Dead a bunch of times in 1995 with everybody on deck and they weren't much better. Certainly wouldn't shell out $589 for them, even with Jerry. They were in decline for several years at the end and you are kidding yourself if you think the music has gotten any better with time. It's tough when the drugs wear off.

But these kids have convinced themselves that they are seeing something amazing and I dare say, the phenomenal Grateful Dead and they have a place to trip around and god bless them, go for it. Have a great time. I can't make it through ten seconds of the tired noise but that is just me. 

The bass player actually doesn't even know why they are quitting. No one has told him. Hey Oteil, don't worry, bet you five bucks they will be back, before you know it. Anybody who believes a rocker who says they are finished playing is a dope.

Assuredly, there are a string of farewell tours in your future. That's rock and roll baby. 

Believe at your own risk.