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Yosemite morning

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

How I would roll...

Conservatives have been falling all over themselves lately accusing the Obama administration of conducting a war on religion. All I can say is that if he is, he ain't much of a commander. Make me a five star general and we will put the saintly in their freaking place. Here is how I think I will start my campaign:

1. Cut off all federal aid to any parochial schools at any level including college. This includes schools like Bob Jones University whose religious beliefs allow them to exclude minorities.

2. Revoke the tax exempt status of any church that endorses candidates or tacitly endorses any political party or that preaches politics from the pulpit.

3. Throw a bunch of priests and cardinals in jail. The ones that molest their charges and those that enable them or hide them from the authorities.

4. Start taxing religious groups that amass large real estate holdings.

5. Outlaw any non secular symbols or references to divinity on any public building, property or land including memorials, creches, ten commandments, coinage, invocations, etc.

6. Outlaw school vouchers.

7. Take the relatively recently added phrase "under god" out of the Pledge of Allegiance.

8. Force right to lifer's to financially care for unwanted or abused children whose mothers were intimidated into carrying them to term. This includes all children born with deformities or in cases of rape and incest.

9. Castrate or similarly dismember any priest, rabbi or minister who molests any person in their flock.

10. Purge our school systems of any faith based or pseudo faith based curriculum devoted to creationism, intelligent design, flat earth, young earth, terracentrecism, flood theology or any other similar mumbo jumbo or science fiction.

11. Pull the tax exempt status and cut all government help and subsidy to any church, mosque, synagogue or other religious organization that discriminates against gays or minorities in any way.

12. Send anyone caught engaging in the practice of glossolalia (speaking in tongues) to a mental hospital for a 24 hour psychiatric evaluation. Ditto anybody else who claims to speak to god.

13. Any government official, including president's, congressmen and judges who use scripture as a way to justify global warming, species decimation, rising sea levels, ozone depletion or air, water or any other pollution and extoll man's dominion of the planet shall immediately lose his or her job.

Not the total solution but definitely a start.

Where you want this killing done?

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

Out on hwy 61. Finished Musahai.
Deli of fri..

Anonymous said...

France and Mexico come to mind as places that decided to clip the political and economic wings of the Catholic Church. The process is well documented in both cases. Near as I can recollect both countries got through it without falling apart. In both cases there was a tremendous amount of civil conflict going on and the secularization of politics and society were facets of revolutionary processes.

The priests got themselves in lots of hot water by being used as tools of the respective aristocracies in ways that the US situation is only a faint echo of.

Of course those nasty commies carried out all sorts of antics with religion also for basically the same reasons but their cultures were repressive in indefensible ways.

My sense is that jerks will always find a way to be jerks and that politicized religion is just one tool in the jerk toolbox. I don't know of any society that knows how to stop jerks from using political or social tools to be bigger and bigger jerks. The US method of balancing factions and power centers against each other has been reasonably effective, so far.

Blue Heron said...

Did you enjoy the book, deli guy?

North County Film Club said...

I salute you !!!!!!
and Jon.
Barbara

Anonymous said...

So would you chop off the hands of thieves as well?

Anonymous said...

Epic book translated pretty well I think. Not enough car chases. Ha. Thanks a bunch for the suggestion and loan.
Deli guy.

Blue Heron said...

Who needs car chases when guys are tearing into each other with swords?

North County Film Club said...

amen.
nancy

Hudgins said...

My General, My General..You have my vote.


Hudgins

MC. said...

You're going to burn in hell for this, my friend, but they're great observations. On the topic of "sending to mental hospitals" ... how about ditto for those predicting the end of the world? They hoodwink the press everytime. I'm so over that forecast.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Blue Heron said...

I wasn't drinking and who said anything about overweight?