When food is outlawed, only outlaws will have food...

The long and insidious reach of the nanny state is reaching out its scaly tentacles once again. Word from the California Highway Patrol that they are going to go after people eating in their cars while driving. CHP crackdown includes drivers who eat behind the wheel, Los Angeles Times 12/30/11.

Under California’s vehicle code, a driver can be ticketed $145 to $1,000 for having “wanton disregard for the safety of persons or property.” This, we are now informed, includes eating.

Let me be the first to say that this is a ridiculous infringement, ludicrous in its scope and something I plan on challenging at every possible moment. In fact I am going to run out to Circle K and down a couple Hostess Cupcakes™ right now as a protest while navigating the local roads. I also have a fervent hope that the officers will be similarly prohibited from eating donuts in their cruisers. But I am sure that the law does not apply to them.

The picture above is a collage of some of my favorite road food. The two essentials, and I am on the road a lot and know of what I speak, are Skittles™ and beef jerky. Jerky is a must. I honestly rarely do the cupcakes, the guilt index is just too high and if I do break down, usually have to hide the evidence before I get home. Tried the Dolly Madison version the other week with no apparent drop off in quality. If I am driving to the bay I will add the trail mix, usually the Trader Joes or Whole Foods with the cranberries. Don't ever get the trail mix with chocolate unless you want a big mess on your hands, literally.

Corn nuts are another nice distraction, but a bag might only last a minute or two. I like the fiji™, don't know why but the square bottle just tastes better. The sliced duck breast is nice if they have it at the Rosemeade Whole Foods, my usual first pit stop. Might go for the rare roast beef and emmentaler swiss too. Oranges are always nice.

Jack in the box tacos are core and cheap, two at 99 cents one of the best deals on the planet.

I think it is high time that we rise up and tell these dogooder bureaucrats to back off and keep their hands off our munchies. We get very angry when we get hungry.

Thank you.