flying fish

Birds drop out of the sky. Fish jumping out of the sea. Cats chasing dogs. If this ain't a sign of end times ladies and gentlemen, you just got another thing coming. Better get your affairs in order right now cause the good lord gonna be taking names. Real soon.

I've looked into these bizarre global goings on and queried a few friends and associates in hopes of divining a clue.

BigDave thinks it's all an elaborate production for a new NBC series. My wife thinks the government is up to its tricks and not telling us about something. Like EMP or a death ray maybe.

I personally like to think that the birds and the bees and the fishes and the fleas maybe got together and decided to stage mass suicides as a protest of man's wayward stewardship of his appointed dominion.

The blog commenters, even on liberal websites like HuffPo, are atwitter with apocalyptic warnings of imminent armageddon and biblical last judgements.

But the U.S. Geologic Survey, which has tracked such events since the 1970's said that the die-offs are running about true to form. In fact we average almost one every other day, in fact 163 per year. They say that there have been at least 95 in the last eight months and that that in itself is probably a major undercount. Turkey vultures, salamanders, ducks, bats, a whole host of creatures have undergone instantaneous seppuku in the last year.

The difference they say is that people are starting to pay attention. All this internet and what have you. Not to say that we aren't totally screwing things up.

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I am starting to hate politics. From the left or the right. This president has more marijuana arrests on his watch than his predecessor, over 850,000 per year. He expanded Bush Administration warrant less wiretapping.  He keeps sending our young men to support a corrupt government in Afghanistan and die in a useless war. While we financially support the real criminals next door, in Pakistan. As my friend Dave said, it's a closed system. The politicians get in power and get totally institutionalized and forget everything they promised you.

The only people I can't stand more than the extreme right are maybe the extreme left. Wade over to AlterNet in your tall rubber boots. I was checking it out today and these liberals were trying to justify and legitimize the bombing of the World Trade Center because of poor treatment of muslims around the world. And Chomsky, the holocaust denying, self loathing, never met a jew I couldn't blame, mumzer was blaming all the world's ills on the Zionist aggressor and their American accomplice. The guy who thinks Iran is such a swell country. And another beauty, Amy Goodman, complaining that we are torturing poor Bradley Manning, a guy who is lucky to still be alive and who in my opinion has genuinely imperiled the lives of many people.

I certainly do not fit the bill as a lockstep liberal. I am pro capital punishment. I do not believe that people who enter this country knowingly and illegally should ever be allowed to legally immigrate and obtain citizenship. I don't think that it is fair that they tax our schools, hospitals and social services, no matter what offsets they may contribute.

I feel that unions have contributed greatly to the financial problems in my state, from Gray Davis kowtowing to the prison guards to the financial mess of cities like Vallejo and San Diego with their bloated pensions to public employees. In my little town, the fireman's union has been against hiring for two new recommended positions, because the firemen don't want to lose any overtime pay.

I am all for outlawing anchor babies. But make it retroactive to the time the europeans first set foot on our shores.

I am pro gun. Own several. Anti assault weapon.

I think that the President screwed Main St. and gave his buddies on Wall St. like Goldman Sachs a get out of jail free card and a taxpayer funded free ride.

I think that the middle class and small business is over regulated. A hawaiian restaurant in my town, now deceased, was told it would have to pay for a $450,000 traffic study in order to have two outside tables.

I think that affirmative action has run its course. I saw vietnamese boat people speaking no english become class valedictorians after five years at UCSD. You couldn't get them out of the library. With no affirmative action, no special privileges.

With Blue Shield announcing yesterday that it was raising its premiums 59 percent, I think one can reasonably ask if health care reform was not in fact an ill conceived boondoggle.

I can't stand leftist anarchists who think that all information should be free and that America is so intrinsically corrupt that the entire body of our diplomatic corps private communications should be exposed to the world no matter what sources are potentially jeopardized by the information.

I think that we need to means test social security and stop double and triple dipping by retired public employees. Because soon there will be nothing left for anyone.

There are probably a bunch of other reasons I don't see eye to eye with the far left. The Hugo Chavez loving Oliver Stones and Sean Penn's of the world. The Naomi Klein jew hating faction. People I loathe and despise. And yet maybe they don't hold a candle to the assholes on the right?

Today Michelle Bachmann listed her proposed spending cuts.

Abolish the Department of Education.
Abolish the FAA.
Defund Planned Parenthood and aid for abortions.
Privatize TSA and Amtrak.
Eliminate Homeland Security payments to states, make them fund their own programs.
Reduce National Science Foundation funding.

Privatize or get rid of the FAA? Are you serious? Can you imagine the shit we would be in? Let the stated handle Homeland Security responsibilities? I really don't think so. Other conservatives of late have called for killing the EPA, FDA, Dep. of Energy, the weakening of food safety legislation, more drilling, coal mining, less environmental regulation, dirty air, kill consumer protection, fund unnecessary defense programs, the list goes on and on. Kill anything that gets in the way of the big corporations raking in more dough.

I had a fellow in the shop yesterday who told me he hated the blog and hated my politics. Rich guy. I told him I didn't think much of his either. But the reality is both sides suck, the center is no man's land and there is little room for nuance in our discussion. A pox on both of their houses. Dirty stinking politicians.

I am a man without a party or possibly a country. With a little luck maybe I get wacked by one of those big dead fish falling out of the sky.