Man up.

I was perusing the local paper today and I see that they are having a workshop over at the Presbyterian Church on the topic of exploring your "authentic manhood". Now I am no homophobe but I can tell a gay come-on when I see one. Not to belabor this but if you have to go to church and get a sweaty hug from some guy in order to stay on the straight and narrow, let's just say that the loafers might already be a bit loose.

All of the god fearing men pictured above had their own issues with the authenticity of their manhood, except for Spock and Kirk of course, and I guess we will have to wait a hundred or so years for that verdict.

I decided to check out the Authentic Manhood website to see if I could understand why satan tests the lord's most faithful warriors and turns them into sodomites. I glanced through a few of the chapter headings and knew in my heart of hearts that these queens were fixing to bust down the closet door. Try "Saddle Up", chapter  14, "Unpacking", Chapter 4 and "Breaking with Mommy", Chapter 7. Whoa, now.

The Quest for Authentic Manhood is the foundational level or ground floor of manhood. This 24-session study focuses on a man's core identity and gives an overview of basic manhood issues. It will help men deal with various identity issues by looking back at past wounds and other things that may have distorted their idea of biblical masculinity. Throughout the course of the study, men will learn how to clearly define manhood and will finally be able to give a succinct and passionate answer to the questions, "What is a man?" and "What am I living to be?" This captivating journey helps men:Resolve wounds from their past.

• Embrace a biblical definition of manhood
• Develop their own personal manhood plan

Hey guys, just a second. If you are developing a personal manhood plan at this stage of your life, I suggest you just come out right now and save yourself a lot of agony. This stuff reads like a harlequin novel at a leather bar. Saddle up indeed, cowboy.



Fallen angels pictured in the top photo left to right clockwise: Matthew Manning, Jim Bakker, Ted Barnes, Tom Brock, Lonnie Frisbee, Paul Crouch, George Rekers and Ted Haggard.